How Are You, Really?
During the 90’s, often at the grocery check-out, a familiar send-off from the clerk would be, ‘Have a good day!’
I fully understand the concern, and the true sentiments, being shared. At the same time, the greeting gradually lost flavor.
Another greeting, I often ponder, comes on a Friday and I am going through a check-out: ‘Do you have any special plans for the weekend?’
At times, I risk the response, ‘Yes, I am a minister, and we will be celebrating in Sunday worship.’ Most often, the response I hear is something like, ‘Oh!’
I believe with COVID has come the repeated question, ‘How are you?’
Often, in pastoral conversations when I ask the question, the response is, ‘Oh, we are OK.’
My follow-up is, ‘How are you, really?’
Travelling with the Magi to Bethlehem in this Advent Season and growing closer to Christmas (just a few more sleeps), this question, “How are you, really?” takes on greater importance.
For colleagues: in business, in the church, friends and family, all ‘walks of life,’ it is a common question. Among colleagues in ministry, the topic or question (more often than not) will be about, ‘how is your Parish?’
As much as it is important to reflect upon the parish, it is more important to reflect on ‘self’: to take inventory of how you feel about yourself, about family, about life in general.
Each of us, clergy and lay, need to take stalk of our mental, emotional, and physical health. It is easy, during these busy hours of preparing for significant seasons in the life of the parish, or in our personal lives, to set aside ‘self-care.’
We can become so caught up in all the busyness outside of the usual routines, along with the added festive activities, we can become overrun with doing too much. For clergy, “you” preach the Sunday sermon, and immediately you are into the throws of the next sermon. For family, “you” finish one week, have a day of rest, hopefully, and turn around, and do it all over again.
Advice from our elders: ‘take time.’
Take time to simply sit down and reflect. Revisit the question, how are you, really?
Blessings in the Season,
Archdeacon Brian+
